Debra Winger: A Hollywood Star’s Journey to a More Private Life

The 1980s saw the rise of a truly captivating actress in Hollywood: Debra Winger. She quickly became a prominent figure in the film industry, earning critical acclaim and even three Academy Award nominations during her impressive climb to stardom. However, her bright star seemed to dim somewhat, leaving many to wonder about her apparent retreat from the spotlight. Now, at 69 years old, Debra Winger remains a fascinating figure, her story continuing to intrigue and inspire those who remember her work.

Winger’s portrayal of Paula, the factory worker who finds romance with Richard Gere’s Naval Officer Zack Mayo in “An Officer and a Gentleman,” connected with audiences on a deep level. The movie’s iconic scene, where Gere carries Winger away from her workplace, became a defining moment in romantic cinema, setting a new bar for love stories on screen. As has been said, “For daydreaming fans, the iconic scene from the romance drama An Officer and a Gentleman, in which Richard Gere portrayed the dashing hero in navy whites, Officer Zack Mayo, became the standard for love stories.” Many viewers envied Winger’s on-screen romances with some of Hollywood’s most sought-after leading men.

Today, Debra Winger possesses a timeless beauty. She has shared glimpses of her life on Instagram, showing her natural grace as she embraces her changing image, transitioning from her signature brown hair to a striking silver. This acceptance of natural aging is something many find admirable.

Before her breakthrough role in “An Officer and a Gentleman,” Winger’s career began with a part in the 1976 film “Sleep Party ’57.” She also played Drusilla, the younger sister of Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman, in the popular 1979 television series “Wonder Woman.” Interestingly, although she was offered more appearances on the show, Winger declined, explaining that she feared being typecast. As has been noted, “Winger played Drusilla, the younger sister of Lynda Carter’s Diana Prince/Wonder Woman, in the popular TV series Wonder Woman (1979), after landing her first major role in the 1976 movie Sleep Party ’57. Winger was requested to make more appearances, but she rejected out of fear that the role would stereotype her.” This decision, she felt, allowed her to explore a wider variety of roles in the exciting decade that was just beginning.

The early 1980s were a truly successful time for Winger. She received Academy Award and Golden Globe nominations for her performances in three defining films. She starred alongside John Travolta in the 1980 hit “Urban Cowboy,” a film that built on Travolta’s huge popularity after “Saturday Night Fever” and “Grease.” Her role as Paula in “An Officer and a Gentleman” (1982) solidified her position as a leading lady. In 1983, she gave a powerful performance as Emma, a young woman facing a terminal illness, in “Terms of Endearment,” sharing the screen with the legendary Shirley MacLaine. As has been summarized, “She starred in Urban Cowboy in 1980 with John Travolta, who at the time was making fans go crazy with his slick dancing in Saturday Night Fever (1977) and Grease (1988); she also played Paula in An Officer and a Gentleman (1982) and Emma, a dying young woman with an overbearing mother, Aurora (Shirley MacLaine), in Terms of Endearment (1983).”

Despite her considerable success, Winger took a break from acting, which led to a lot of speculation about her reasons for stepping away. Rumors circulated about alleged conflicts with co-stars, adding an element of mystery to her story. One of the most talked-about relationships was her dynamic with Richard Gere on the set of “An Officer and a Gentleman.” While their on-screen chemistry was undeniable, there seemed to be some tension off-screen. Louis Gossett Jr., who played Sgt. Emil Foley in the film, hinted at this in his book, “An Actor and a Gentleman,” saying, “The onscreen chemistry between the two of them was terrific, but it was a different story once the camera was turned off. They couldn’t have remained more far from one another.” Gossett also recounted Winger’s critiques of Gere’s acting, claiming she once called him “a brick wall.” As has been reported, “Co-star Louis Gossett Jr., who played Sgt. Emil Foley, wrote the following passage from his book An Actor and a Gentleman, which was featured on ABC News: ‘The onscreen chemistry between the two of them was terrific, but it was a different story once the camera was turned off.’ They couldn’t have remained more far from one another.”

The relationship between Winger and Shirley MacLaine during the filming of “Terms of Endearment” also became the subject of gossip. Their very different personalities, both on and off-screen, reportedly caused some friction. MacLaine described their first meeting in an interview with People, saying, “I was wearing all my leftover movie-star fur coats to see how my character would feel. Debra was wearing a miniskirt and combat boots. ‘Oh my goodness,’ I said.” As People magazine reported, “In fact, the set became the source of Hollywood’s most cherished rumors. Winger desired the highest billing. According to reports, one slugged the other.” The tension between the two actresses reportedly continued at the Academy Awards, where both were nominated for Best Actress. MacLaine, upon winning, famously declared, “I deserve this!”

However, Winger has consistently said that her time away from acting was a personal choice, not a result of on-set disagreements. “I wasn’t interested in the upcoming parts. I had either already felt that or had already done it. I required a challenge. I threw myself into it wholeheartedly because my life challenged me more than its components,” Winger told People. She emphasized her need for personal growth and fulfillment beyond acting. She explained, ““I pressed the pause button” on Hollywood for private rather than work-related reasons.”

After her role in the 1995 romantic comedy “Forget Paris,” Winger took a six-year break. During this time, she moved to New York City and focused on her personal life. She married actor Arliss Howard in 1996, becoming stepmother to his son, Sam, and welcoming a son, Gideon Babe, in 1997. She also has a daughter, Noah Hutton, from her previous marriage to Timothy Hutton. As has been detailed, “Winger took a six-year hiatus after costarring with Billy Crystal in the 1995 romantic comedy Forget Paris. She relocated to New York City around that period and began concentrating on actor Arliss Howard, whom she married in 1996. She is the stepmother to Howard’s son from a previous marriage, Sam, and the couple’s son, Gideon Babe, was born in 1997. Noah Hutton, her other biological child, was born while she was married to Timothy Hutton, her first husband (1986 to 1990).”

Howard directed and produced the 2001 film “Big Bad Love,” in which Winger co-starred with Rosanna Arquette. Arquette also directed the 2002 documentary “Searching for Debra Winger,” which explored Winger’s decision to step away from acting at the peak of her career. As has been explained, “Her husband, who costarred with Winger and Rosanna Arquette in the 2001 picture Big Bad Love, directed and produced the film. Her next job was the 2002 movie Searching for Debra Winger. As the documentary’s director, Arquette tries to explain why Winger abruptly stopped performing at the height of her career.”

In recent years, Winger has returned to acting, choosing roles that demonstrate her talent and versatility. She appeared in the 2017 romantic comedy “The Lovers,” the 2020 crime-comedy “Kajillionaire,” and the 2008 drama “Rachel Getting Married.” She also participated in the anthology film “With/In, Volume 2” in 2021, with a segment written and directed by her husband, Arliss Howard, in which she also co-starred. As has been noted, “Winger’s roles in the 2017 romantic comedy The Lovers, the crime-comedy Kajillionaire (2020), and Rachel Getting Married (2008) opposite Anne Hathaway gave her considerable momentum. She appeared in the Her Own segment of With/In, Volume two of the anthological drama film, in 2021. Her husband, who also co-stars, wrote and directed the segment.”

Debra Winger’s view of Hollywood has changed over time. “I have no idea what Hollywood is. Now that I’m living under the freaking sign, I just chuckle while staring at it. Despite the fact that there may be some crowds that I am unaware of, Winger stated, Los Angeles is a place, but the idea of Hollywood doesn’t really exist for me.” She seems to have found a balance and contentment, combining

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